I need to say it to someone

[faithless]

My girlfriend is pregnant. I'm 19, she's 18. She already aborted once in her life. She doesn't want to do it again.

F-U-C-K

 

[Meduzz]

:shock:
Wow dude....
Is it certain? An ex of mine had 3 weeks delay on her menstruation after we had some unsafe sex (without ejaculating in her that is...). I was 17 at the time.

Is it possible for you to take care for the child? Do you want to take care of the child?

 

[user_1919]

I know how you feel to a certain extent. I got into some fucked ass situation where this one girl got pregnant, but I knew it couldn't have been mine. It was some other guys. Yeah it was one fucked ass situation, I was scared shit less. But I honestly cannot talk because I am not in your situation, but one bit of advice at my father always give me is, "It is happening for a reason". There is a reason, no matter how bad it seems at the time. Life will never give you anything you do not need. Everything will be ok, just chill out, or at least try. I feel for you man,

Take care,
PEACE & LOVE

 

[Lion]

If she wants to keep it, then you gotta make the choice for yourself. Do you want to look after the kid? Talk things over and over and over with your girlfriend, close friends, and parents..

Good luck.

 

[druglessdouglas]

Its not the end of the world. you may enjoy being a dad. good luck with it all

 

[faithless]

We had a break in our relation for 1week and the "THING" (huh) happened when we got back together.


She had a 6month depression when she aborted the first (and only) time, that's why she doesn't want it again. Yet it happened in very bad conditions for her and I think I could help her psychologically this time... but seems that it's not possible.

So she put the child for adoption when he arrives, or she keep it.


I am sooo young to have this. I have a billion things to do, see and live before I can take care of a child. I cannot even control my own life, I'll have another one to control.


Besides, I am with this girl since 3months now.. That's nothing. Nothing at all.


I soo would like to flee, get away from the problems and say fuck to humanity, go to alaska and find a trippy bus. I already wanted to do it before, but not for the same reasons. Now I feel I will be like in prison.


And those exams I must pass in a week. Even before that, I could hardly find a motivation to get through... eww



Anyway, thanks for your replies, I don't know how to express the feeling it made, but I liked it.

 

[faithless]

Its not the end of the world. you may enjoy being a dad. good luck with it all

It could even be said like the beginning of something great. But heh, I fear that even if having a child is not the end of the world, it sucks even more to have a child in the supergreat world we live in now.

 

[Lion]

first off all: cheer up! What comes around goes around!
second: do your best for your exams! all you can do. A degree will help a fucking lott in this country.

running away isn't a good solution. You're in this together. She'll get into a depression if you run away, again. Would you want to do that to someone you love?

Think things over real well, both of you..

 

[GOD]

"Its not the end of the world. you may enjoy being a dad. good luck with it all"

"first off all: cheer up! What comes around goes around! second: do your best for your exams! all you can do. A degree will help a fucking lott in this country. running away isn't a good solution. You're in this together. She'll get into a depression if you run away, again. Would you want to do that to someone you love? Think things over real well, both of you."

Hey its a shock , but guess what ? . Its realy amazing fun and fullfilling being with someone when they are pregnant , and watching a birth is as good as a trip . It all will make you into a man and if your carefull teach you real love . When you first see it your going to realy fall in love and be very proud . Its understandable that your confused now . If i were you i`d go to her and tell her to have it and that youll stand by her . Tell her you are confused and frightened and tell her you cant garantee to stay with her forever but that you will be honest , not lie , cheat or use her and that you will do your best . Tell her that you need to do your qualifications and that you cant garantee that it will be easy or that it wont be financialy hard . Give her a hug and a kiss and tell her shes a good girl . Theres nothing more you can do . If you run away now youll spend the rest of your life regreting it and running away from things .

I wish i was you . Good luck to both of you .

And keep talking here , I`m sure i can say that we all care about you and will help if we can .

 

[user_1919]

Sometimes having a kid is the most spritual experience one will ever encounter.

 

[Nomada]

My ex told she was pregnant after we broke up just to fuck with my head.
:shock:
tranquility and courage for you faithless. This is just a ride.

 

[faithless]

"Its not the end of the world. you may enjoy being a dad. good luck with it all"

"first off all: cheer up! What comes around goes around! second: do your best for your exams! all you can do. A degree will help a fucking lott in this country. running away isn't a good solution. You're in this together. She'll get into a depression if you run away, again. Would you want to do that to someone you love? Think things over real well, both of you."

Of course I won't run away. I just want to do it, but I know I won't.

Hey its a shock , but guess what ? . Its realy amazing fun and fullfilling being with someone when they are pregnant , and watching a birth is as good as a trip .

I do not want a trip. I would have bought some LSD id that's what I wanted.

It all will make you into a man and if your carefull teach you real love .

I don't even know if I really love my girlfriend. I have some hard difficulties with what comes with words like "love" and feelings.

When you first see it your going to realy fall in love and be very proud . Its understandable that your confused now . If i were you i`d go to her and tell her to have it and that youll stand by her . Tell her you are confused and frightened and tell her you cant garantee to stay with her forever but that you will be honest , not lie , cheat or use her and that you will do your best . Tell her that you need to do your qualifications and that you cant garantee that it will be easy or that it wont be financialy hard . Give her a hug and a kiss and tell her shes a good girl . Theres nothing more you can do . If you run away now youll spend the rest of your life regreting it and running away from things .

Thanks a lot for those words.

I wish i was you . Good luck to both of you .

I doubt that. But thank you again

And keep talking here , I`m sure i can say that we all care about you and will help if we can .

So she's coming at home tomorrow so we can talk. If I don't get rid of the great mess in my head, I don't think I can study for my exams.

I'm becoming mad when I think I'll have a kid. I am not at all ready for this, I will have to talk about it to my parents, which will make me become even more mad. I'm not sure there's anybody thinking I could be a father. I don't think so neither.

And sometimes I think that's it. It's done now. I just have to accept it. To accept I just won't be out with my friends so often, won't go to festival anymore, won't enjoy beying as dumb as a kid..

And there come the dark thoughts again.

 

[GOD]

It doesnt mean you wont see your friends or go to festivals anymore . You dont have to live with her . Having a kid isnt a prison . Its strange at first but a person soon gets used to it . Its not much more than having a dog . You feed it , wash it and change its nappy . Its fun and centers a person . You havent got to marry her , or be there 24 hours a day . Its not a prison . At first its a bit of preasure because it needs feeding and nappy changing every few hours and not sleeping regularly can be a bit stressfull . But if you take it in turns and the grand parents help its a new adventure . It only changed my life for the better and didnt stop me doing anything i was doing before . A lot of getting on with a baby is body contact and body warmth , that doesnt stop you from smoking or doing other things . You just have to smoke away from the baby and be a little more carefull about it .

Another thing . Do you think that many people who are together realy love each other at first , or ever ? Most people have a relationship because they dont want to be alone . Love either comes with time or not . respect for yourself and your partner is the basis for love . If you wait for "the right one" you could possibly wait all your life . Partners dont fit together perfectly , there is no perfect partner . Its give and take . There is probably no woman out there that looks like your ideal , fucks the way you want , meets your standard of intelligence , has your interests and agrees with you all the time . People have to grow together and grow up together . Its an investment and can be hard but if it works its very rewarding . If not you know you did your best and can live with your conscience .

 

[magickmumu]

Hey man. You should have thought about all this before.

I am sorry for being hard, but that's how I feel about it.
Use a condom next time.

I wish you luck

 

[magickmumu]

childeren are not like dogs.

 

[Meduzz]

Dogs are like children

 

[magickmumu]

If you turn dog around, you get god.
:lol:

 

[psm]

She had a 6month depression when she aborted the first (and only) time, that's why she doesn't want it again. Yet it happened in very bad conditions for her and I think I could help her psychologically this time... but seems that it's not possible.

Might not be the proper time to teach her about life then...

Well, it might sound cruel, but it's both your fault. Take better care.
Now its responsibility that stems from the consequences of not taking care enough...

She does have the right to keep it. Sure. It's her body. You do have the right to leave her, sure, it's your life. But you can still take responsibility for a child. Help her. Share it. You don't need to be together with her to do that. Actually it would be fatally wrong if you would stay together just for the kids. That would not be a good energetic surrounding to grow up.
But sharing the responsibility for a kid works for a lot of people. This is after all the age of single-moms.

Sit down with her and go through the options. Then come up with a consent. Then do the same with both your parents (their help can be crucial). stay cool and consider: you created life.

 

[GOD]

Who said that children are like dogs ? I was talking about taking over the responsibility for another being and the change that makes in a persons life .

Having a dog is a responsibility and you have to change your life when you get one , you have to take care of its needs , educate it and treat it good . It takes a lot of your time , energy and intelligence . So does a kid . The only realy big difference is the time scale . If you treat both good and show them love it comes back multiplyed .

 

[magickmumu]

You,re right god. Children are like dogs.

Sorry for being ignorant.