HAHA.
"So a girl invites her new boyfriend to sleep over for the night, for the first time. The night goes well, but the guy doesn't make a move, and eventually the girl says good night, rolls over, but doesn't get to bed. The guy about an hour after this proceeds to slowly roll her over on her back and begins to have sexual intercourse with his lady. She starts to moan and say "Oh yes!" and the guy responds with "Oh you're awake"?"
True story, in some column in the newspaper...
Here is a VERY bad joke:
I was looking out over my lawn from my bedroom window the other day, I had dug a hole for a fence post the previous day, and was admiring my great work. It was then that I saw my neighbor lurk over to my yard suspiciously and start filling my hole with water. I tisked, and said to myself "It's ok, he means well."
This joke will grow on you, I promise :D