Finding Peace Between Our Sheets

[Caduceus Mercurius]

As psychonauts we are very aware of what happens to our brain chemistry when we take certain substances. Most of us are also aware that the chemistry and electrical charge of the nervous system is never in a steady state: as we go through the day concentrations of certain hormones and neuropeptides will rise and lower according to natural daily cycles and the particular experiences one has.

We know food alters our consciousness in certain ways, but what about sex? There are many ancient traditions linking spiritual awareness to certain sexual practices and attitudes. I came across an interesting article today at Reality Sandwich, a talk between Adam Ellenbaas and Marnia Robinson, which disusses amongst other things what happens in our brains during and especially after orgasm. For those interested in finding inner peace and deep love through whatever means possible, this article and the book it's based upon may be very useful.

Sex happens in the brain. It's a complex sequence of neurochemical events even more than it is a genital event. I say "brain" because you can stick an electrode in someone's brain, or spinal cord, and produce the sensation of orgasm without ever touching his or her genitals.

Instead of an electrode, your body uses a surge of a neurochemical called dopamine to trigger the sensation of orgasm in the reward circuitry of your brain. Unfortunately it takes as long as two weeks for this deep part of the brain to return to homeostasis after such intense stimulation. While the precise mechanisms are not yet understood, the central player in this natural programmed "hangover" appears to be dopamine.

It's clear that dopamine levels drop after orgasm, and that another neurochemical, prolactin, surges (a sexual satiation signal) to keep dopamine in check. Receptors for testosterone rapidly decline in the reward circuitry, further inhibiting dopamine release.

One can view the orgasm cycle as similar to a drug or alcohol cycle because it emanates from the same mechanism in the brain, using the same neurochemical, dopamine. When anything -- whether a substance (cocaine, too much sugar) or an activity (gambling, orgasm) -- over-stimulates your reward circuitry, it produces a high, followed by a period of recovery.

That recovery is, in a sense, a withdrawal. The difference between sex and drugs is that the orgasm "hangover" is so much a part of us, so natural and programmed, that it is hard to recognize -- unless, of course, you escape the cycle entirely.

In short, the way we currently manage our sexual energy could prove to be the common biological mechanism behind such diverse phenomena as the one-night stand, the sexless marriage, infidelity, and porn addiction. It contributes to the nearly universal experience that "the honeymoon never lasts longer than a year." It is why close friendships that bloom into love affairs so often turn sour. The culprit is the natural perception shifts that follow sexual satiation, and cause us to find each other less rewarding than before.

To fool Mother Nature, you obviously have to do something different in the bedroom. This is why the Taoists, and others, recommended learning to make love in a way that doesn't trigger our subconscious mating program -- or rather, triggers only the attachment part of it, not the move on part of it. We can make use of this natural attachment program, which bonds us to our children and parents, in our romances, too, by emphasizing generous affection, playfulness, gentle intercourse, and, of course, by avoiding orgasm. Results include greater harmony and wellbeing, and, remarkably, less sexual frustration.

You can read the entire article here: Finding Peace Between Our Sheets

 

[magickpencil]

very very interesting, thank you!

 

[Maru]

Interresting indeed but

we simply aren't as susceptible to manipulation of any kind, whether by advertisers, governments or porn producers.

That woman seems addicted to 'control'

 

[Forkbender]

^ I don't know if that's the case, though. Would you buy a new sweater if you're satisfied?

 

[poisoninthestain]

I find this Alex Grey picture among his best. It's very beautiful. btw he actually did artwork for nirvana's album covers back in the day.

 

[Guest]

Thanks for the link, now I have something to do for this evening

EDIT : w00t w00t w00t, 1000th post

 

[????????]

I'm curious about the guys commenting on the article about the change in perspective after abstaining from orgasm for 3 weeks... anybody has tried something like that here?

 

[random]

I've tried it, not 3 weeks but 2.
And I actually felt some difference in prespective/feeling of life.

As I read somewhere, you can have pleasure (and I confirm it), without reaching orgasm.

It's something you have to try, and feel it yourself.