damn, the crazy feeling never goes away

[IJesusChrist]

Everytime I smoke, there is always a snapping feeling of insanity, just for a little bit. Smoked a bit last night on a car ride;

At first it was ok, but then the dread came back. An intense feeling of "Something is seriously wrong with your body/mind/future." It is so intense, so immense, so engulfing, but I'm used to it, I recognize it, so it is becoming easier to handle now. But it is still there. After about 15-20 minutes it went away and I started talking to the driver, (I don't know if it would have passed if I was alone).

A good hour and a half went by until it came back. I was trying to sleep and that is when I had a flash back of either DMT or Mushrooms, of a point where I erased from my memory, well two flashbacks simultaneously.

one of the flashbacks was when I was trying to sleep and two voices became very prominent (I was either tripping or very high) and they started talking, and slowly the conversation became about me. I was trying to analyze if I could possibly be making this up, I tried to approach it analytically and objectionally without any emotion at first, but there was a sentence that was mentioned that I felt as if I could not have said on my own, there was no way.

Anyways, the second, simultaneous flashback was when I was on DMT and a god had told me something that made me realize how awfully simple reality is. Of course I couldn't remember exactly what was said, but I remember the feeling as if all of reality was a lie, and life was simply a house of cards.

But... I came out of it fine. I handled every situation very moderately, without too much pushing or shoving, without too much worry without too much anxiety. It was insightful, intelligent, and entertaining overall. Really made me realize how fucked up the world is though, jesus god this place is a slaughter house - but nobody knows who is slaughtering.

The book "Ishmael" sums it up nicely in my opinion and view:

Everyone [in the 60's/70's] knew we were being trapped in, but nobody knew where the fencing was. Nobody really knew where the power came from.

Which is why I don't get pissed at any particular group of people, any organization, nor any person in general. No person is evil, no person deserves anything - ideas are to blame and they can spread like wildfire with their rewards and genuine nature. Ideas are a virus that cannot be stopped in this day and age - they travel through the "straws" of the internet, the boobs on TV, the word at the office, the conversation of potheads on couches, they are the ultimate killing machine, yet the ultimate saviors...

holllly fuck I am rambling

 

[spice]

"Everyone [in the 60's/70's] knew we were being trapped in, but nobody knew where the fencing was. Nobody really knew where the power came from"


that paradigm isnt here, now.......even I know 'where the power comes from'......



.....and I don't really think that blaming 'memes' for our individual shortcomings and character flaws is really taking responsibility for the solution of the problem, which must come from the same source as the problem, within, not without
(and I'm not trying to be a dickhead here, but this seems to be a recurrent explanation in conversations you have been having with other people than myself....it MUST come from within. you cannot run away. We are the beast.)


you will eventually begin to ascribe responsibility to people, it's a part of maturing called 'holding people accountable for their actions'



I personally do not see why you would be hesitant to point a finger at a person who deserves to be spotlighted.....you know, if we cannot or won't practice transparency willingly, then maybe it's a necessity to be a whistleblower sometimes

 

[spice]

There was a book I read about ten years ago called 'The Lucifer Principle' which basically is on the evolution of 'evil' within our species, and how our notions of 'good' and 'bad' are shaped by what he calls the 'superorganism' -humanity at large.

He also explained the now familiar 'meme' concept


He notes that the main vector of evolution shifted from genes swimming through the protoplasmic soup of the early earth to memes floating through a sea of human brains.

Both genes and memes mercilessly exploit their hosts in their struggle for survival and bid to overspread the earth.

Though rat broods are normally loving to each other, insert a rodent from a different clan that smells different, and they tear the unfortunate apart –
even if he carries their genetic stock.

Humans are more advanced: they have language, culture and religions that bind closer than any uniform. The Hebrew genocide of the Canaanites was just and splendid, for their ethno-genetic stock was chosen by the LORD God- (their meme, or 'mind virus')



-and yes, yes, yes......the truth is painful, hey here's some now-


"Over the millennia of ancient history, memes gradually divorced themselves from the genetic level altogether, appearing in “universal” religions like Zoroastrianism and Christianity after St. Paul. Competing universal religions and ideologies now encompass nearly the whole world. The confer several advantages. First, the effective illusion of control, which is good guarantor of health and mental agility (note that most medical procedures even today are based on getting the patient to believe she will recover and hence doing so). Second, memes help consolidate huge communities, and hence ensure their own long-term survival.

A society is, in effect, a vast, problem-solving neural net – humans are to it like brain cells are to a mind. As a swarm of individuals interact in limited and simple ways (bees, humans), an extraordinarily complex structure emerges (a beehive, the modern economy). One feature of human society is male expendability – from cradle to old age, men have weaker immune systems, are more accident-prone and die quicker. This is especially marked in primitive societies where warfare is brutal and incessant"


He also speaks of the link between climate and behaivour-

"Mother Nature can afford to play with men as dice, ensuring that only the fittest survive. Interestingly, life is most brutal and profligate in the south, where resources are plentiful. In the tropics, male birds tend to have bright plumes to attract female attention (which also makes them highly visible to predators); but in the north, birds have grayer colors designed to blend into the surroundings, and their sex tends to be indistinguishable to the human eye. That is because the female needs male help to rear her chicks through the hard winter months of dearth. Likewise with humans, polygamy has been most prevalent in southern cultures – even if many guys die in battles for prestige, territory and slaves, the women can continue the race without most of them.
_________________________________________________

more-

"Success breeds success, failure breeds failure. Low ranking baboons suffer increased levels of glucocorticoids, a stress hormone that acts as a slow poison, and walk around slouched and defeated. The same thing operates in human societies – being at the bottom of the pecking order is bad for you, as you suffer from increased rates of depression, blood pressure, heart attacks, etc – obviously this also makes you unattractive and entrenches your gutter status. In contrast, higher ranking monkeys people walk upright and their testicles hang down further. (So consequently no wonder that that is the reason why men are recommended Alexander posture and walking with one’s legs wide apart… it is to project the image of the physical aspects of the alpha male; on third thought that would explain society’s dislike for the “pick-up artist”, since their craft essentially cheats the naturally emergent hierarchy by getting men to mimic alpha traits instead of actually being one"

hmmm



seems he had something to say to me as well, LOL-



"There’s a very good reason for the existence of these feedback loops that reinforce social hierarchy – the alternative to hierarchy, with its inherent, diffuse coercion, is anarchy. This entails a state of constant expenditure of previous, limited energy on banditry and defense. In this situation, the weak and friendless get trampled down even more quickly and ruthlessly than if they were (merely) oppressed within a hierarchic system. So it is actually in the interests of everyone, including even its lowliest members. (The exceptions are, of course, those who believe that their position in the hierarchy is unjustified on the basis of their abilities or beliefs, e.g. the Bolshevik insurrectionist, the Islamist cell member, etc, who would like to level the current hierarchic system in a cleansing purge before rebuilding it in their own image""


this IS an unconscious mechanism, apparently as ppowerful as any of the rest

 

[thescientist]

Ferret read somewhere that 1 out of 10 people can trip on weed. This is due "supposedly" to a imbalance of lithium in the brain, which is not noticeable until one smokes some ganja... Sounds like the experience your describing...