IJesusChrist
Holofractale de l'hypervérité
- Inscrit
- 22 Juil 2008
- Messages
- 7 482
Been having trouble sleeping again (Realized it was my mattress lol).
Smoked a decent amount of marijane (A decent amount for me probably wouldn't get anyone on here high). I played some video games, but quickly got bored of that. I went and sat in some darkness and it felt great. I started thinking - all kinds of things. Happy things, sad things, mad things, etc. A friend came in who has perpetually been annoying me for various reasons. He is very hypocritical, can never get a social cue if his life depended on it, continually pushes his ideas on me, etc. I've got quite a few problems with him that bother me.
I've been realizing lately, however, that on some days I can completely get along with him and enjoy his company, while others I really really detest it and wish he would go away. It would be obvious to the majority of the population when I would rather not be bothered - but to him, he just keeps pushing, just keeps talking, just keeps trying. Annoying.
Anyways. I was laying down on the couch, covering my face with my arm and he came in and began making random noises to get my attention and let me know he was there. I didn't give any feedback. He got louder with these random noises and eventually said something to me. I gave a low grumble of a response. He left. I then realized my view of him is completely subjective. I could have approached the same situation with a different mind set and my response would have been much more pleasant and probably would have encouraged him to engage in a deeper conversation.
But it stems from this observation one of the most deeply disturbing, yet liberating epiphanies I've had. I realized that my entire life changes when I'm in a different mood. This seems obvious "you're brain makes your reality" but here I was - observing it. I was switching through these mindsets - one of happiness and contentedness, one of despair and irritability, one of a knowledge seeking indifferent man, etc. The odd thing was I realized I had been living in these frame's of mind previously, completely unknowing that my entire reality is controlled by these frames. I don't just mean if I'm grumpy - everyone seems grumpy. I mean people's faces change - the lighting in the room changes - all sights and sounds completely change. Here I saw the source of bad trips, good trips, and trips with various outcomes.
I understand to a lot of people that this seems pretty straight forward - but the intensity of which the mind alters the world around is so astounding to me I could hardly believe it. I had finally seen the path from depression and agony to steady life to bliss and happiness.
I began to think about the possible neurological influences of this, and being somewhat high I can say they are no more than speculation. But I have become somewhat adapt at realizing now my ability to "see" differently..
I hope this doesn't come off as a simple realization of being happy makes other things seem happy, or being sad makes things seem sad. It was more of the realization that being happy absolutely creates happiness. Being happy yourself, in essence, makes the entire world happy. Of course, there are competing consciousnesses in the world, so it doesn't always come so smoothly.
If only this had meaning in other threads
Smoked a decent amount of marijane (A decent amount for me probably wouldn't get anyone on here high). I played some video games, but quickly got bored of that. I went and sat in some darkness and it felt great. I started thinking - all kinds of things. Happy things, sad things, mad things, etc. A friend came in who has perpetually been annoying me for various reasons. He is very hypocritical, can never get a social cue if his life depended on it, continually pushes his ideas on me, etc. I've got quite a few problems with him that bother me.
I've been realizing lately, however, that on some days I can completely get along with him and enjoy his company, while others I really really detest it and wish he would go away. It would be obvious to the majority of the population when I would rather not be bothered - but to him, he just keeps pushing, just keeps talking, just keeps trying. Annoying.
Anyways. I was laying down on the couch, covering my face with my arm and he came in and began making random noises to get my attention and let me know he was there. I didn't give any feedback. He got louder with these random noises and eventually said something to me. I gave a low grumble of a response. He left. I then realized my view of him is completely subjective. I could have approached the same situation with a different mind set and my response would have been much more pleasant and probably would have encouraged him to engage in a deeper conversation.
But it stems from this observation one of the most deeply disturbing, yet liberating epiphanies I've had. I realized that my entire life changes when I'm in a different mood. This seems obvious "you're brain makes your reality" but here I was - observing it. I was switching through these mindsets - one of happiness and contentedness, one of despair and irritability, one of a knowledge seeking indifferent man, etc. The odd thing was I realized I had been living in these frame's of mind previously, completely unknowing that my entire reality is controlled by these frames. I don't just mean if I'm grumpy - everyone seems grumpy. I mean people's faces change - the lighting in the room changes - all sights and sounds completely change. Here I saw the source of bad trips, good trips, and trips with various outcomes.
I understand to a lot of people that this seems pretty straight forward - but the intensity of which the mind alters the world around is so astounding to me I could hardly believe it. I had finally seen the path from depression and agony to steady life to bliss and happiness.
I began to think about the possible neurological influences of this, and being somewhat high I can say they are no more than speculation. But I have become somewhat adapt at realizing now my ability to "see" differently..
I hope this doesn't come off as a simple realization of being happy makes other things seem happy, or being sad makes things seem sad. It was more of the realization that being happy absolutely creates happiness. Being happy yourself, in essence, makes the entire world happy. Of course, there are competing consciousnesses in the world, so it doesn't always come so smoothly.
If only this had meaning in other threads